Engage Me

I've been set up. Bamboozled. The wool was yanked over my eyes. I had a fast one pulled on me. I've been tricked, mislead, and swindled. I've been taken for a ride and hoodwinked. I'm befuddled and confused as to how I got here, but I'm sure I was hornswoggled. It all started when I was called home, when I felt drawn back here to the place that had previously filled me with fear and doubt. With hatred and anger and, quite frankly, disgust. But I returned to Maple Valley as I was called, and here I am.

First I met Jimmy Creek, a funny name for a funny young man. He stood awkwardly outside of the reception tent and I awkwardly approached him to make conversation because it's who I awkwardly am. We hit it off and now call one another soul maytes, you know, maytes in the way that Australians mean it. Then there was Lindsey Watson, the baby sister of boys I went to High School with, and her boyfriend Chris Bunn. Fun loving, easy going - they were all easy enough to befriend. The Scoop was reformed and we all started to meet. My favorite books are Ecclesiastes and Revelations, I hate Paul and I love the old testament - "Malia, do you know Mark Dullanty?"

I knew you in High School and I never much cared for you, you were always a bit of a douche. You knew me in High School and you never much cared for me, I was always a bit of the same. The constant insistance that we should hang out and all we could do was scoff. I came to Mars and you decided maybe I wasn't all that bad, I decided you were still a douche but I loved all your friends and I wasn't about to let them fall by the wayside because of it. Then Mexico came and I didn't mean to go, but God placed me there (yet again). And it was there in the dirt that we created a spark of friendship that would lead us places we never imagined.

It was San Diego that changed my mind about you, in the car after getting your nose repierced. You tried to keep a straight face and you couldn't manage it, I don't know that I had ever really seen you laugh like that before. I realized what an amazing friend you are, even if you pretend not to be. From that day forward, I'm not sure there were three days in a row that we didn't spend doing something. Whether it was cheese and wine night or comic movie marathons, gabbing about Pauly Shore or art or cooking, sustainable living and south of the border... and somewhere along the line I came to care for you. I remember the night, I fell asleep in your lap. I had a nightmare and I may have even shouted. It scared you, I remember you asking if there was something you could do. I didn't want you to touch me, because if you touched me it might comfort me and then our friendship would change. I didn't want that, I told myself a million times I didn't want that. And then, less than a week later we made the decision we were dating.

It was terrifying, really. I was so sure it was going to end up in tears and disappointment like so many other things. But you had become my best friend, and what is better than marrying your best friend. You were there for me in the best of times and the worst. You sent me sweet uplifting text messages or just called to tell me something funny. You were always upfront and honest with me, you challenged me and accepted me for who I am. You made sure that I was always comfortable and yet you were always pushing me to be the best version of me. I fell in love with you. It was slow, slower than you, I think. But it was always real, more real than I even dared to hope for.

We talked about getting engaged, I knew you were asking my parents permission. We talked about how we want to save and only buy a wedding ring. We emailed about a house and we signed our names "mark and malia" - all lower case, because only adults capitalize. But, all the same, I wasn't expecting it. I didn't see it coming. You started to tear up and asked if I would add another name to mine, I couldn't even say yes. I started to laugh and cry all at the same time and I felt ridiculous. You asked again if I would marry you and to my great suprise, I could finally manage a yes. A resounding and overpowering yes.

We haven't been together for long and we are young and we make mistakes all the time. But you know me and love me for exactly who I am. And I know and love you for exactly who you are. There is nothing I would love more than to be your two. There is nothing I would love more than having coffee every morning and falling asleep next to you every night. There is nothing I would love more than being broke with you because we refuse to buy cheapy food. There is nothing I would love more than to read the Bible and watch old cartoons. There is nothing I would love more than to flip through old comics and graphic novels and go grocery shopping with you for the rest of our lives. There is nothing I would love more than Pauly Shore marathons and laying in the sunshine. There is nothing I would love more than to be called your wife.

It wasn't romantic in a Hollywood sense, but I wouldn't have had it any other way. I love the $.25 ring that is on my finger until we actually get married. I love the white gold nose ring and that we want our ceremony to be like 15 minutes long- tops. I love that we want kids to come to our wedding and that we are planning it together. I love that we are more excited about the marriage after than the actual getting married part. I love all of it and I love you. I am so excited for our life together. I am so excited!

Cheers!