Gistfuls

There is too much happening and I cannot for the life of me catch up to the number of drafts I have created, so I will give you the gist.

Rory is one and a half. He talks to us in his own language, which mostly satisfies him, except when it doesn't and he gets upset that we can't understand him. He is animated and active. He loves to play the drums and count and read books. He likes berries and gummy vitamins, he cleans up after himself if he knows we are going to leave or go outside, he hates children's music. He rolls his eyes with gusto and can throw a ball almost too well for his own good. He likes to put hair clips on his head and pretend to wear my earrings, he loves trucks and cars and anything that goes "brrrmmmm," especially airplanes.

Mark continues to surprise me with all of his interests - from sustainability, to wood working, to fixing dishwashers - the man is simply amazing. He works at the Maple Valley Signs and is somewhat interested in his work there, but primarily loves the opportunity to work on his graphic design skills. He volunteers with me at Life101 youth group and is a crowd favorite. Between his long hair, straight forward manner, and hatred of closed-toed shoes? I'm not surprised that kids love him. After all, I love him!

I am have applied to North Park University and take the ACT in April to hopefully begin taking courses in May. I am applying to scholarships left and right, studying like a fiend, and still trying to work as many hours as possible. Thankfully, we have hired a new Youth Director, so I can pull that off my plate. But as Mark and I continue to plan the Mexico Mission Trip for our Youth Group, we are still so busy.

How goes our own missions funding? Well, our initial boom of support was wonderful, but with our busy schedules over the Holidays, we fell behind and are stuck at about 22% of our goal (if you want to support us, check out our giving site!). I had a meeting last Thursday with a church that is considering sponsoring us - if they decide to sponsor us, we will have the opportunity to visit their church at some point this Spring to see if people would like to sponsor us individually as well. We are praying hard for that.

This Sunday we will visit residents at a Covenant retirement home. We have small hopes for individual financial support, but most of the residents are on a fixed income. Our main goal in visiting is to share our love of missions and build relationships with residents.

We are trying to set up times to visit other churches and organizations as well, but it often seems overwhelming. In May we will be attending our conference's Annual Meeting as delegates and will hopefully have the opportunity to speak briefly during the weekend. In June we will visit another church for them to decide whether to support us as a church as well as whether to allow us to visit their congregation. Pray for all of this, we need it.

But what will you do in Oaxaca, you ask? Well, Mark would like to primarily be involved in sustainability; both for businesses started up through Fuentes Libres as well as agricultural sustainability (rooftop gardens, beekeeping, etc). I will be focused on Rory, but Mexico has a family based culture, so I will most likely be able to be involved in a lot of things with Rory in tow. I'm eager to check out Casa Hogar and be involved with Semillas de Salud, local youth groups, and support local churches outside of Oaxaca.

But the truth is, a lot of what we will be doing specifically is up in the air depending on what is needed from us by the missionaries and churches already present in Oaxaca. We are there to learn and grow God's Kingdom and what He is already doing. We hope to be mentored under Erika and Nils Clauson in order to become Long Term Missionaries after spending time as Short Term-ers. There's nothing concrete or sexy to sell you about why we're going or what we will be doing. We are decidedly unsexy.

What else?

"I am weary with my crying out; my throat is parched. My eyes grow dim with waiting for my God."

Psalm 69:3

Here is where I am at mentally: I just want something different. I am tired of waiting. This has been my sentiment for the last several weeks, months even. I just want to be done waiting. I have tried. I have tried to embrace patience and I was even mildly successful for a short while. But I am weary. I am parched. And my eyes grow dim. Waiting for funds, waiting for a new youth director, waiting to go to school, waiting to grow our family, waiting to hear from churches, waiting... there's more, trust me.

"What is my strength, that I should wait? And what is my end, that I should be patient?"

Job 6:11

That's right, I'm quoting Job! I have been experiencing overwhelming frustration with the fact that our circumstances just have not changed. I feel caught in the middle of a hurricane, the eye of the storm. Everything around me is moving at a pace I can't seem to keep track of and life continues, but it is also so still. I don't like it. I was not okay with being patient, then I was okay, now I am not again. It's confusing and infuriating and I just want a respite. I want a moment to not be overwhelmed by the work, one second to feel like we are moving at an acceptable pace, a single breath to believe that we will make it to Oaxaca. Is there a light at the end of the tunnel? I'm not really sure at this point. People continually ask "When do you leave?" And I smile and say "Oh, well it depends on fundraising," and then explain the surrounding circumstances. What I really want to say is... well, it's not appropriate.

But here is the kicker.

"And now, O Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in you."

Psalm 39:7

My hope is in God. It's fuzzy and sometimes it falters. It's fuzzy, faltering hope. But it's there! Most of the time...

This is where I'm sitting. On a ledge, at the start line, waiting for the gun or the champagne bottle to break. My life is steadily turning into a Dr Seuss novel - yes, novel. Pray for me. I'm ridiculous.