Yep. I'm pregnant. If you're wondering why we didn't do a cute photo shoot? It's because my 21 month old refuses to sit still. Especially when outdoors. We had to work at it to even get this gem. We keep telling him that he's going to be a big brother, reassuring him that when we have a new baby there is just more love to give out, explaining there is a baby in my tummy, etc... he is uninterested. But he definitely knows he is not the only one vying for our attention anymore. Our wonderful sleeper very suddenly refused to sleep in his own bed, Daddy became an unwanted creature, all-things-Mommy-all-the-time!!! Oh Rory knows we are having a baby, he knows.
So pregnancy this time around is so very different. I was reading through my original Pregnancy Files and I touch on the fact that women are more often sicker during their first pregnancy because your body isn't quite sure what's happening to it. Second time around? Your body (like your almost 2 year old) knows. And introduces a new cast of characters. Firstly? You think you're welcoming your friend morning sickness again - but you're not. You're welcoming an entirely new creature called the same name. Because this time around, the nausea is different and this baby requires different things. Then bloating appears on the scene. You just suddenly have the same little kangaroo pouch you had right after having your first baby. Last time it took forever and two trimesters to have a bump, this time around it's 8 weeks? What the actual hell. Also introducing itself is a new brand of exhaustion.
I . Am . So . Tired . All . The . Time
I fell asleep at 7:30pm the other night and slept until 7:30am. And I was still tired. All I want to do is curl up in bed and drift into slumberland - all the time. And honestly? I do. I am all of the sudden the very best napper, rester, sleeper, or whatever else you want to call it. Something I seriously struggled with the first time around and have always had trouble with when Rory is napping. Second pregnancy, you are full of surprises.
This is where Rory lives currently: in my lap, hugging one part of my body or another.
My first prenatal appointment isn't for another several weeks, which is late, but I am hoping that because it is so late it will make me think I am not as far along as I actually am and then December will just sneak up on me! But maybe not... maybe I will just live through pregnancy knowing exactly where I am. Either way, I am so excited to be adding another little to our family. It might make things so much harder than they already are, but I am not afraid of that. Not because I'm amazing, mostly because I'm too tired to be afraid of it. Also because I believe that all of this is in the perfect timing of God. Aren't I neat? Sure. Why not. :)
There is something powerful about stopping to take the time to use your imagination as an adult. Especially when interacting with your kids. It takes new effort and energy you weren't even aware was necessary. I feel like I day dream and imagine quite a bit, but actually involving someone else in your imagination and being involved in theirs? Is a whole other talent that we really lose as kids.
These are the characters: We have Buzz Lightyear, a Spiderman Pez dispenser, the Phantom, Aquaman, Batman, Simba, a knight, a bird, a ciuccio (binky), a strange wobbly bear, a weird green puppy, a sharp tooth and a spike-tail (we watch Land Before Time). The dinosaurs Rory will play with on their own, but the rest belong to the Pirate Ship - which is definitely a new kind of crew as far as I know. Buzz is Rory's favorite (we also watch the Toy Stories) and therefore the clear Captain of the ship. He spends his time at the helm or up at the top of the masts. The others have various assigned positions around the ship and are neatly tucked away below deck when it is time to put the ship to bed. Rory is very considerate of the crew members desires for sleep.
Rory loves to involve me in his games and I probably don't engage often enough, because "often enough" would ideally be always. Today we had naked adventure-time outside (at least, Rory did) and I just watched him move about and let him take me with him when he wanted to. It is such a gift to have the opportunity to dive into his world. He is so bright and imaginative, curious, with such a good sense of humour. I am constantly surprised by the blessings he pours out on me.