14 April 2011

Ramblings In A Wedding Dress

i don't believe in circumstance
and God exists for me
how could he not?
i've got the double beat in my chest
i'm standing right here
and there's nowhere i'd rather be
it's manna from heaven
no need for a future
no need for a past
i'm sure of the moment this changed
couldn't keep from smiling
it makes me nervous
but sunshine detracts from anxiety
life doesn't go as you plan
life plans you as it goes
i don't have a tomorrow or yesterday
all i have this is moment
and i want it to be spent doing the things i love
with those people i love
ask me anything
i'll ask you for one thing
i am not complicated
and i don't believe in games of the heart
with me it's never a guess
my heart is on my wrist
no sleeves to speak of
or shelter it from the harm it has befallen
but i'm always willing to try
mayhaps that's my downfall
i will always trust all over again
i love how i feel safe between all of you
a cocoon of friends
my heart is in fewer pieces these days
once it was in shards
but i've never let that stop me
i believe in you
whether you believe in me or not
i love you more than i could ever express
i don't have to know who you are
my drug of choice is given
not taken
and this world needs more users
my nose is in a book
while my heart is in a spray paint can
i trust God to know
all the things i don't
which could never mean i won't seek
but also means i might not find
this is what i want
i am almost who i want to be
but i'm not sure you can really reach
all your potential in this life
there's something greater waiting
i believe in miracles
i think you're one
yes, you
please don't argue
you can't see things from my perspective
so you could never really understand
exactly how enigmatic you really are
i am glad to have these people around me
i want to hold hands
to laugh and to whisper
to know secrets
to tell them
and you are the people i want
to do all these things with
how blessed have i been!
with all of these glorious people
i am jealous of myself in this
of those people who i believe
would look out for me
and i for them
i'm the kind of girl
who will never really grow up
just living in the inbetween
existing in the maybe
i like it there
it's my own
i want to marry my best friend
whoever he might be
to do the things we like to do
not because it's date night
just because we do
i wish not for the perfect lover
but for the perfect heart
because i'm looking for forever
and i don't much care for a taste
when what i wanted was the whole thing
i'm not sure i'll ever be so lucky
but i refuse to settle for less
i'll close my eyes
and count to a million
perfection is an illusion of perspective
what petty games we play
to invade eachothers hearts
when all we really had to do was ask
all you really have to do is ask