It's been awhile. I have no excuses for my lack of blogging, not really. Actually, I've written quite a bit over the past couple weeks or so, seeing if I could accumulate enough material to make up a magazine and keeping updates recorded in a small journal I keep for myself. I definitely could create a magazine or at least some type of newsletter, the real question is whether or not I could sustain it financially or whether I have the self discipline. Anddd computer access is also an issue, but I am sure I could figure that piece out if I truly wanted. I could make time to find a resource.
I think the real reason I haven't written in so long is that I am torn on a fairly crucial issue - my future. The nonplanner is becoming antsy and difficult again. What's worse is that it isn't only affecting my blog efforts, but also my job and contact with other human life forms ((and the occasional alien, but whatever)). That's all I'll say at the moment, I need time to figure this one out on my own I think. I have sought out the opinions of others and they have helped greatly, but what I really need is prayer. What you believe is irrelevant, it's what I believe that makes me need it. That too is an entirely different topic...
Resting on my heart lately has been several things, so let's get to them. This blog is about me being the honesty I want to see in the world and I have been avoiding honesty ((and blogging)). Not lying, just evading the need to address my truths. Fair dinkum.
1. Check out this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HuaavycxU1Q
An oldtime favorite band of mine hooked up with an oldtime favorite artist of a different band and this is their new hit single. It's one of those songs that just hit me. I was driving when I heard it for the first time and I just... melted into the music. I'm that kind of person, I can just meld with a song. Like a chemical reaction, sparks and bonding and something new emerged. It made me think about how much I need to be doing for this world that I cherish so dearly. Existing is not enough. Existing at a bare minimum is not enough. Living green, blogging, preaching to those who should know better? Not enough. My time and sweat and blood is required. I am required. And I am not giving my all. So selfish am I to cling to comfort, when the world around me is full of things I can change. I can't just be the honesty I want to see in the world. I need to be the change, the beauty, the love, the awe, the wonder, the all that I want to see.
2. Visting the Pacific North West was amazing and I am so glad I went, but it has made me miss my friends and the life I had there. Not that it wasn't a wonderful life, it just wasn't healthy for me. My friends and family were all supportive and fantastic, but I wasn't healthy for me. I settled into my little bubble and just let the world bounce off of me when I should have been seeking out the things, the places, the people I let slide by my radar. Every object, every place, every person has a story and it is on me to hear them for myself. To let them go unheard would be an injustice in every sense of the word.
As for writing, I have been on top of that. I'm writing some kind of travel journal that is getting to be quite long and really kind of fun. Hey, maybe it will be that book I am always starting and promising to write. Who knows, keep your fingers crossed for that one. Think of all the charities that could benefit from book royalties! I could even start my own! And combine it with (RED) and TWLOHA and PostSecret and all my other favorite nonprofits! Eek! ... Okay, mayhaps I am getting a bit ahead of myself.
I think that is all for now, but stay tuned. I promise to be back soon.